Wednesday, October 1, 2014

One Horror Film a Day 2014! 10-1: "The Collection"

So last night; yes... I saw "The Collection". This is part of the ONE HORROR FILM A DAY! celebration that I do every October. Every October. Even the Octobers where my co-worker's wife is in labor and I have a puppy and there's a new comic due and First Friday is this Friday and the Vertex Goth Garage sale is on Sunday and I have to make a Halloween costume and Pressure is the enemy of creativity! Thank you, Joel Hodgson...

Right. "The Collection". Netflix said I'd love this. I dunno. I'm guessing it's a sequel to "The Collector" which I haven't seen, but I'm guessing The Collector is this serial killer who likes to murder an entire buildingsworth in the most Hollywood way possible, like with a huge thresher wheel shaving the top of a crowd of ravers, and then take one survivor to lock in a box or something. I don't think this truly makes him a serial killer in the traditional sense, but... Anyway, it's like Saw, but without any of that troublesome insight or poetry that Jigsaw infused into his deathtraps. So it's the sequel, so the survivor from the last film (I'm presuming) is wrangled into rescuing someone's daughter, and he's escorted by a paramilitary unit, and they all talk tough, and they all point their guns, and they... they... YAAWWWWWWWWWWWNnnnn, I confess to not making it all the way through this, and probably made a New Years' Resolution sometime back to sleep through any "horror" movie where the victims are all macho paramilitary. 2/5 appearances by Bubbles from "The Wire".

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